Wally's Silver Hammer
by FinalEmblem
Summary: A fanfic based on the great Beatles track... If you're interested in the song or the band, or just plain curious, give it a chance. Rated for Violence, I guess it's horror just because little ol' Wally is a little OOC...
1. Fanny Was Quizzical

Fanny sat around her house studying science in her room... Just a typical weekday night alone with no one or nothing but her books... She had a test tube sitting not far from her and she was taking notes on reactions for certain acids and compounds that she added to the concoction. She continued like this for hours, but then at 10:30 PM, she heard her phone go off...

_Who in the world could that be?... _She pondered to herself, "... Hello?" she asked nervously into the phone. It wasn't like her to get phone calls... Especially this late at night...

"Oh hello... Is this Fanny Fulbright?" A masculine voice asked on the other end, oozing with an australian accent.

"Er... Yeah... And who is this?" She demanded.

There was a pause, but then the voice picked back up, "Oh, silly me... It's Wallabee... Wallabee Beatles, from Medicines class, remember?"

Her heart stopped, she knew who was talking to her now. Wallabee was a quiet man, he rarely answered in class, and he always had this strange aura about him... But then again, that could just be because the night class was not exactly a place where a twenty four year old should be in their life.

"What do YOU want?" She asked, still not sure at what he was getting at.

"I just wanted to know if you wanted to go see a movie with me?..." He said kindly... innocently...

Fanny fumbled with the phone, "Are you mad? It's almost eleven at night! We have an exam tomorrow!"

"I know that... But I need to relieve some stress, I've been studying nonstop all day." He said smoothly into the phone.

Fanny never really noticed it, but Wallabee was quite an attractive young man... Still... The thought of him asking her on a date was still quite strange. "I don't know..."

"Aw, come on now... Don't make me beg." He cooed seductively into the mouthpiece. Something about this wasn't rubbing Fanny the right way, but she was a little distracted by the fact a guy her age was showing interest in her.

"A-alright... Why don't you meet me here in a half hour?"

"Sound perfect..." He laughed into the phone, his breathing sending shivers down her spine... Then he hung up...

_A half hour later_

Fanny was finishing cleaning up before the boy got to her house. She just completed preparing her hair when she heard a knock at the door. She excitedly ran down the stairs and swung the door open, revealing Wally standing there in his usual orange sweatshirt and baggy jeans. His arms were crossed behind his back...

"Hello, Wally..." Fanny said, a bit surprised... He didn't seem ready to go to the movies or anything. "Are we still going to see that film?" She asked, confused.

The blond walked in toward her and she backed up with each step he took toward her. "Oh..." He started, "I was just thinking we can go straight to the stress relief part..."

Fanny nervously blushed as he backed her up into a wall. "Oh... I don't know if I really know how to-"

But she was cut off by Wally's smooth whisper, "Don't worry..." He said calmly, "Just close your eyes and let me do all the work..."

Confused, the red head simply listened to the man, "A-alright..."

And then the next thing she knew, everything went black.

* * *

Hoagie P. Gilligan, a new recruit cop, was inspecting the bloody scene at the entrance to Fanny's house. He saw the girl bruised and beaten to death laying on the floor. She had welts all over her and it was clear that bones had been broken... He looked around for any sign of a weapon, but found none...

"Shame..." He whispered, looking around for any sign of what happened to the girl... He searched high and low and then finally found something slid underneath the carpet, half showing, half hidden.

Knowing he should be careful, Hoagie bent down and slowly grabbed the item from the floor... He observed it and saw a post-it on a hard CD case.

**Track 3**

This is all the small note had written on it... The brown haired cop peeled the paper off of the CD case and opened it, and saw a copy of Abbey Road, by the Beatles... He knew he should be observing the crime scene more thoroughly, but his curiosity was growing at a rapid pace. He rushed out to his unmarked car and turned it on, inserting Abbey Road into the slot. He skipped 'Come Together' and 'Something' and made his way straight to track 3, 'Maxwell's Silver Hammer'...

"Is this some sort of a joke?" He asked himself as he listened to the dark lyrics covered up by a lighthearted sound. He was simply dumbfounded by this little piece of 'evidence'. He waited until the forensics came to help along with other cops, and Hoagie pulled one of his coworkers over.

"Hey Josh..." He mumbled.

The other cop came over to Hoagie and gave him a look, "What's up?"

"I was in there... And I found a copy of Abbey Road... You know, the Beatles, stuffed under the carpet..."

"Yeah... So?"

"There was a note that said 'Track 3' on it... and when I listened to it... It was some song about silver hammers, and killing some girl in her house while she was alone... Now... Go in there and you try to tell me that this girl's wounds don't look like a beating from a hammer..."

"Oh Hoagie, c'mon, don't tell me you're actually reading into something stupid like this?"

Hoagie scowled, "It's too strange to just be a coincidence! It seems like he's using it as a guide for his actions... And if he's reenacting the song, then he's gonna kill his teacher next!"

His fellow cop began laughing uncontrollably, "That's rich! Do you know how foolish you sound? Oh boy, Hoagie, seriously... It's just our guy giving us sass... There's no way he'd dare pull something like this again, that is to say if he isn't caught already by tomorrow... Don't read into it, crazy people are just that for a reason... Now I think you should go back home, you've been here long enough..."

Hoagie huffed, but agreed, "Alright... Maybe it is stupid to be looking this far into it... I guess I'll just sleep on it... But tell me if you hear anything else... Got it?"

"Sure, Hoagie, sure..."

* * *

A/N: ... What?... Don't give me that look! I'm not crazy! I just love Wally and the Beatles, and this song! Sorry, but I've been dying to write this for a long time now, and seeing a picture on deviantart convinced me to actually go through with it. It's just a little side project that I'm doing that won't exceed three chapters. If you love the Beatles, Maxwell's Silver Hammer, or just the fic in it's own right, then review! I'd very much appreciate it ;)


	2. Back In School Again

_'Bang bang Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head  
Clang clang Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that she was dead'_

Wally awoke to the sound of this song at 9:30 PM, a half hour after his night course began. Grinning, he looked around his apartment. "Class time..." He laughed to himself as he rose from his bed and walked over to a wall where he had three post its placed. One read 'Classmate', and there was an X through it... The other two read 'Teacher' and 'Judge'. Slipping on his usual attire, Wally also pulled out a drawer by his dresser and it was filled with hammers of all shapes and sizes.

He grabbed a pocket-fitting weapon and slid it into his jeans with a devious grin on his face, and then he left for class...

Mrs. Lumberg, the professor, was sitting at her desk as she watched the rest of the class take their exams. Then, 45 minutes late, Wally swung the door open and it hit the wall with a thud.

"Mr. Beatles!" The teacher exclaimed, "You're almost an hour late!"

"Whoops..." Wally grunted, pretending to look at a watch that he wasn't actually wearing, "S'pose you're right..."

"Wallabee! You will not be given extra time, so why don't you take a seat and do the best you can at this point?"

The blond looked around at his fellow med students and laughed, "Well that's certainly not fair!" He went over to one girl's exam and picked it up. "I should level the playing field! It's not right that everyone else should have a 45 minute advantage on me!" Wally chuckled as he shredded the girl's exam, leaving the victim in awe.

"Mr. Beatles!" Mrs. Lumberg shouted, "They have a time advantage because they arrived ON TIME! Something you should have assured you done before walking into an important exam so late! Now... I don't wish to cause an unpleasant scene... So take an exam, a seat, and remain quiet... I'll see you after class."

Grinning widely, Wally thanked her, "You don't have any clue how good it is to hear you use those words, Mrs. Lumberg! Alright! I'll just take my seat and wait for my punishment..." He plopped down at his desk with his exam and smiled, humming the tune to track three on Abbey Road.

And so, after everyone had filed out of the class, all that was left was Mrs. Lumberg, Wally, and his hammer... "Now, Wallabee, if you insist on acting like a child, you'll be punished like one... Now write, 50 times, that you will be more respectful..."

Wally simply nodded and began writing, his teacher looked down at her papers to grade and drifted off as the australian wrote... and wrote... and wrote some more...

_Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again  
Teacher gets annoyed  
Wishing to avoid an unpleasant scene  
__She tells Max to stay when class has gone away  
__So he waits behind  
__Writing fifty times, "I must not be so"  
__But when she turns her back on the boy  
__He creeps up from behind  
__Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer  
__Came down upon her head  
__Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer  
__Made sure that she was dead_

"Oh Mrs. Lumberggggg!" Wally called cheerfully. He walked to his desk to pick up his exam to give to the teacher.

"Done already?" She asked, getting up and observing the board. "Hold on, this isn't what I had you write... Isn't this some song-" But she was cut off by Wally, who whipped his hammer out his jeans pocket...

* * *

"Damn it all!" Hoagie shouted, kneeling down next to the mangled body of the teacher... "I knew it was coming! That idiot Josh convinced me I was crazy! Well now who's the one in the wrong?" Looked at the board to see the lyrics that the murderer had left, and then noticed hammers drawn on the board, and another scribbling a little bit away from the lyrics...

**follow the four **

"... What could this possibly mean?" Hoagie asked himself. He immediately grabbed hold of one of his fellow cops and pointed to the corner of the chalk board, "Look!" He hissed.

The man looked at the three words, "... Follow the four?..."

"What do you think?"

"I think you're letting yourself get too caught up in this psycho's game, Gilligan..."

Hoagie lost it, turning red, he shouted, "Damn it! Don't you see? He's clearly mimicking the song! And he's leaving clues behind for us to follow!"

His coworker shook his head, "Hoagie... Why on earth would he want us to find him? What kind of idiot in the right mind would want to lead us to their location?"

The brown haired man looked away in embarrassment, it was a little strange that the murderer would be leading them to something important... But he maintained belief that he should still look into the 'clue'... "He's clearly NOT in the right mind!" He shouted. "W-whatever... I'm gonna head out, I can't handle this right now..."

"Yeah, just go get some rest and don't think anything more of this 'game' our hammerer wants us to play..."

As Hoagie left the classroom, he walked outside and immediately started pondering about the 'follow the four' comment... He got in his car and started driving aimlessly. He opened his window to let a breeze in and he peered out his window, and saw something...

"Wait a second... Route 4!" The man exclaimed as he saw a sign for it out his window. He drove down the route and continued for quite some time, approximately an hour, before he soon realized that this was leading nowhere fast... He growled in frustration seeing as this was leading nowhere... Hoagie returned home and crashed on his couch.

_Think Gilligan, think! What can I say about someone I haven't met?... He's got a thing for the Beatles... That much is clear... And more specifically, Abbey Road and this song... _He sat and pondered, he went to his own CD collection and grabbed a copy of Abbey Road, not wanting to go to his car for the murderer's copy. He looked at the song list and tried to see what he could obtain... He looked at track four... 'Oh! Darling'... There's not much to take from that... Frustrated, Hoagie spent hours trying to figure out what the code could mean.

He awoke the next morning in a daze, on his couch. He looked at the cover one final time and then he noticed something... "Wait!" He shouted, "Could it be?"

He jumped into his car and drove down to the abandoned music studio and quickly hopped out, running into the building, gun at the ready. He reached the door and angrily kicked it in, and he charged into the building. He didn't see anything, but he heard what sounded like a bass echoing around the halls. "Is that..." Hoagie pondered, "The bass line to 'Maxwell's Silver Hammer'?..."

The brown haired man ran in the direction of the sound and finally the bass was coming through clearly right through a door that Hoagie stood outside of... Gun at the ready, he slowly opened the door to reveal Wally sitting on a stool with a bass and an amp. The blond looked up at Hoagie and gave a slight chuckle, "So... You figured it out, eh?"

Hoagie, gun still pointed at the man, hissed, "Yeah... I got it... I followed John, Ringo, Paul and George across the only marked crosswalk in town... The one right outside... You know, it was actually a very clever trick to say 'follow the four', much more complicated than merely putting 'track 3' on a copy of Abbey Road..."

Wally simply shook his head and said, "Oh rest assured, I was hoping you'd get it..."

Hoagie gripped his gun and began to sweat, "Don't pull anything funny, I've got the weapon advantage!"

The australian man rose from his stool and put his hands in the air. "I know when I'm beat... Now why don't you get those shiny cuffs of yours and restrain me before I decide to leave?... Oh I'm Wallabee, by the way." He tried to offer in a friendly tone.

Surprised by his calmness, and quite a bit scared, Hoagie ignored Wally's attempt at exchanging names and quickly cuffed his criminal's hands behind his back and hissed, "You are under arrest, anything you say can and will be used against you-"

* * *

A/N Well... I don't know how appealing this fic is to some people, but let me just say this... It's a crapload of fun to write! So I'll probably leave things at a close in the next chapter, but I haven't decided yet. It all depends on stuff... But anyway, I love to hear what you think, even if it isn't necessarily praise, so go ahead and review ;)


	3. A Dirty One

Wally sat alone in an interrogation room, with nothing but a dim lamp to help him see out his wicked emerald eyes. Hoagie watched him through a one way mirror in a separate room...

_I don't get it!_ He mentally screamed, _He just doesn't make any sense! I mean, look at him! He's just so calm! What could possibly be going through his head?_

Hoagie stared at the australian merely sitting there, staring into the mirror as if he knew exactly where the cop was sitting... He didn't wince, budge, even exhale heavily. He just sat there... Smirking...

Knowing he had to talk to the psycho at some point, Hoagie made his way out of the observing room and into the interrogation room with the murderer. He pulled up a chair across the table placed before them and leaned forward, arms crossed. "Well, well... It seems I've caught a dirty one..." The man quoted the song that was becoming increasingly prominent in his life.

The blond australian finally broke his grim smirk, and laughed, "Ha! Now you're getting it! Honestly, I'm glad someone caught on... Let me guess... No one wanted to listen to you?"

Hoagie only remained silent, his brown eyes gazing into the twisted green ones of his captive. After a moment or two of silence, the cop chuckled slightly, "Yup... No one cared about what I had to say... And all along it brought me right to you."

The hammerer shook his head in a friendly way, "I'm glad you were able to figure it out..."

Taking out a cigarette, the brown haired man took a drag, "You know... For a deranged murderer... You seem like quite a relaxed person... I'm surprised you didn't try to kill me on the spot... You know, when I found you."

Wally, still cuffed, grinned at Hoagie, "Well first of all, you had the gun... And come on now, officer, I would never kill you... You have no reason to die!"

Confused, Hoagie gave him a weird look, "Oh? And that girl and the teacher did?"

"Well, yes, otherwise I would have left them alone..."

The cop looked a little taken back, "Well... Can you tell me why you chose them?"

"Ask Maxwell." Was the quick response of the criminal.

Hoagie was beginning to struggle with himself... He wasn't sure what he was losing faster, his patience or his mind... "What exactly is that supposed to mean?..." He asked angrily.

Wally merely shook his head, "Oh come on, now! Don't tell me you haven't gotten it already?" But his interrogator simply gave a confused glare in response. "Well... I'm sure you'll find out what I mean when the time is right... You're a smart guy, officer, I'm positive you'll be kicking yourself in the morning when you realize just what it is I'm trying to say to you." His voice remained cool and collected the entire time.

* * *

The next day, Hoagie sat on his bed, his mind couldn't help but drift off toward Wallabee Beatles and his trial today... He got up and made himself some coffee and made his way to the station. His coworkers were all greeting him happily, applauding him for his capture of the violent murderer, even Josh apologized for his doubts in Hoagie's abilities.

But... Something still wasn't quite right to the brown haired cop...

While he was right in that all the little 'clues' would lead to Wally, he was still uneasy about something... At first he believed that the australian was simply getting cocky. But ever since he went so willingly, Hoagie had his doubts about the intentions of the man, especially after what he said about Hoagie was going to be kicking himself when he found out what Wally was talking about...

Still in deep thought, it wasn't until he made his way to his office, labeled 'P.C. 31' that it hit him... And then it all made sense... Hoagie nearly spat out his coffee and screamed mentally, _That's it! Shit, I don't have much time!_

Hoagie sprinted through the station to his car when he was stopped by Josh again. "Hey pal, where are you going?"

Panting for breath, the cop looked at his coworker, "No time! I have to stop Wallabee Beatles!"

Giving him a look, Josh replied, "Ha! Good one, Gilligan! You already busted him though, remember?"

"No! You don't get it! He wanted to be caught!"

"... What the hell are you talking about?"

"Don't you see?" Hoagie shouted, "He's _still_ mimicking the song! Getting arrested was part of 'Maxwell's Silver Hammer'!"

"I'm not a fan of the Beatles, myself, so I don't know what you're talking about... But regardless..." Josh assured his fellow cop, "I think we can rest assured knowing that he won't be doing anymore damage."

Hoagie didn't want to sit around and listen to his coworker any longer, he knew he had made a huge mistake pursuing Wally and not taking precautions after capturing the man... He had to stop this before the australian would be able to complete the song, otherwise the next murder, the judge, would be _his _fault...

* * *

Wally stood alone in a court room, behind the stand as Nigel Uno, the judge, was asking the blond australian questions related to the crime. This case was not given much attention as not many people knew of Wallabee Beatles and his hammering spree, except two classmates of his... The room merely consisting of only the judge, the supposed murderer, and the two young woman, Kuki and Abby.

The two of them were sitting in the space designated for onlookers to the court, and they both held signs that were praying for Wallabee's freedom. Abby shouted, "Wallabee Beatles must go free!"

"Yeah!" Kuki added, "No one can prove that he did it!"

The murderous man smiled happily from the stand and looked at the judge, "Yes, your honor, what exactly can you do to prove I'm innocent? I can paint you testimonial pictures all I want, but you're not believing me!"

Nigel glared at Abby and Kuki and sighed, "Woman, please! According to the cop who captured him, he admitted to leaving a series of clues that lead straight to him..."

Kuki stared up at him and shouted, "I don't buy it! We go to school with Wallabee!"

Finishing up the sentence, Abby said, "Yeah, he would never do something like this! We're tellin' you that you've got the wrong guy!"

But the judge did not agree, and he told them so, "Unless you can give me better reasoning than that, I'm afraid I'm forced to do this..." He slammed his gavel and began, "Wallabee Beatles, I find you guilty of- H-hey... Where did Mr. Beatles go?" He asked, noticing the australian was no longer behind his stand... Then he heard a noise coming from behind...

"Nice hammer, judge..." He heard Wallabee's thick accent say slyly from behind him, hammer at the ready, "... But mine's bigger..."

* * *

Hoagie sped into the court parking lot and put the car in park, and ran to the building, but the doors were locked... "Damn it all!" He shouted, slamming on the door. But then as if someone were waiting for him, he heard the shriek of woman, and the doors flung wide open, Kuki and Abby came sprinting out of the court blood splattered all over them...

Hoagie knew he was too late...

He looked at the judge's stand to see Wally standing there, looking downwards. Hoagie could only guess that he was staring at the body of his latest victim... The criminal noticed him standing at the doorway and gave a look. "Oh... Sorry you had to see me like this officer..." He apologized, wiping some blood from his face, "I would have been cleaner about it if I had only known you were coming..." He slowly made his way down from the stand.

"I-I-I was too late..." Hoagie groaned, looking at the blood-covered australian walking toward him. Out of defense he whipped out his gun. "Just tell me something... I know you did everything for the sake of copying the song... But why did you feel the need to do this in the first place?"

Wally simply laughed, "Well... I dunno... I guess something just sort of snapped... I mean, I've always loved the Beatles and I guess they just have such an enchanting effect on you..."

"You're gonna have to give me a better reason than that!"

The hammerer shrugged, and shook his head, "I don't know what to tell you... Some people like to use songs as a way to express their feelings, I suppose I was just feeling dark one day and this song spoke to me like none other could..."

Hoagie gave him an uncomfortable look as he was approached by the murderer, "S-stand back! I can't let you leave this place!"

Wally laughed, "What are you going to do? Arrest me again? A shit load of good that did you the first time! But despite this little scene, I can promise you that I won't be killing anymore... The song is over and I've had my fun..." He looked at Hoagie honestly, "But we both know you can't let me walk out of here... I'm leaving in cuffs or a body bag... So I'll leave that decision up to you."

The cop gave a long hard look at Wally and then froze.

He pointed his gun at Wally's chest and shot...

Falling to the floor, the australian writhed in pain, "Ah... Good choice, friend... I wouldn't have trusted me either... I've been known to be crafty..."

Hoagie knew there was going to be repercussions for his actions, but he also knew he couldn't take another chance to let Wally continue on his spree of killing. He watched Wally on the ground for a moment before his fellow cops burst in. They ran to the judge's body and Josh walked over to Hoagie, gun still hot in his hand.

"Aw, Gilligan..." The man sighed, as he looked at the murderer on the floor, knowing his coworker caused this scene. "You know we can't help you out with this, right?"

"I know..."

Josh grudgingly pulled out his handcuffs and apologized, "I'm sorry about this, Hoagie, I really am... But you are under arrest anything you say can and will be-" He continued his rant as Hoagie's attention drifted toward Wally again.

Hoagie could tell that the man had little time left, and he didn't regret his actions, this man just ruined his life. "You're a monster..." He hissed to the australian on the floor.

"Nah..." Wallabee chuckled for the last time, "I'm just a silver hammer man..."

* * *

A/N Well that just about raps up one of the more deranged KND stories on FF! I had fun writing this story and I'm glad people appreciate the references and such! It's great to see people who have taste in good music ;) Anyway, thanks again for your reviews, everyone, hope you enjoyed!


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